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ByBlacks.com | #1 online magazine for Black Canadians

Sex & Relationships

Nothing Wrong With A Little Self Love

Nothing Wrong With A Little Self Love
Donna Savage By Donna Savage
Published on Wednesday, December 3, 2014 - 00:00
Masturbation is a normal healthy part of sexuality in people single or otherwise.

It’s as normal as the air you breathe; but some people are still caught up in the myths:

• No your fingers won’t fall off

• No your vagina won’t close up

• No your penis won’t clog up and fall off
• And the famous one of all, no you won’t go blind.

The most common reasons adults give for masturbating are to relieve sexual tension, achieve sexual pleasure, or to have sexual pleasure when partners are unavailable. Many people think that others masturbate only when they do not have a sex partner. But that is not true. In fact, people who have regular sex partners are more likely to masturbate than people without sex partners.

Masturbation is often thought of as a solo act, many people also enjoy masturbation together, which is called Mutual masturbation: (the act of two or more people masturbating in each other presence).

Masturbation is a feel good verb and it does feel good for those who have mastered the art, or at least attempt to try to discover what it is they like about touching themselves. It can help us explore the types of touch we like the most and help us learn how to get excited and how to reach orgasm. It’s not only about inserting your finger into your vagina or rubbing your clitoris, it’s about making love and exploring your body; many women get an orgasm by just playing with their nipples.
Lube plays a big part in masturbation, the wetter the better, it doesn’t matter what type of lube, water based or silicone, whatever works for you.

For men performing masturbation, all they need is lube, 5 fingers and good porn!

For ladies it’s a little more involved. For some women, rubbing directly on the clit may be too sensitive; try rubbing around the area instead. The more you play, the more you will learn how and where to touch yourself for maximum pleasure. Get to know your own body, what feels good, what doesn’t etc.

You may want to use a vibrating sex toy to stimulate yourself by gently passing the head of the vibrator around the clitoral area. If it’s too sensitive, turn down the speed. There are many vibrators to choose from, you may want to try different toys on different days with different speeds and vibrations. Always use a lubricant when using sex toys to ensure you don’t cause yourself any harm.

The removable shower head is also very sensually stimulating. If you can regulate the flow of water, find a setting that gives you a steady stream of water building up to a strong jet and move it around letting the water stimulate your senses.

Don’t be afraid to love and discover what it is you love about you!

Last modified on Friday, August 21, 2020 - 12:30

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